The Impact of Loss and Trauma
Kayla Arestivo, the daughter of Bill Fallon, a victim of the 9/11 attacks, recalls the day her father went to work, never to return. Being only eight years old at the time, she struggled to understand the magnitude of the situation. Kayla vividly remembers holding back her tears, attempting to hide her emotions. She yearned to feel closer to her father and find answers amid the chaos at Ground Zero.
The Search for Understanding
In the aftermath of her father’s death, Kayla received cliché phrases like “he’s in a better place” and “he’s with God now.” However, these well-intentioned words failed to provide the solace and understanding she desperately sought. The grief consumed her, leading to anger and confusion. At 10 years old, she was diagnosed with PTSD and resorted to self-harm.
A Masked Smile and Lingering Questions
Kayla’s journey through middle and high school was a paradox. Outwardly, she appeared as the model student with numerous friends, but internally, she continued to struggle. The traumatic event of 9/11 remained unresolved, causing her to cut herself and unleash her anger, particularly towards her mother. While her family did not discuss that fateful day, Kayla clung to the annual memorial service at Ground Zero for a sense of closure.
The Elusive Search for Closure
Despite her efforts, Kayla could not find the closure she longed for. Though she stopped cutting herself at 18, she fell into the destructive pattern of drug abuse. This led to her expulsion from her mother’s house, dropping out of college, and unsuccessful attempts at rehab. Kayla felt trapped, believing her pain was an eternal companion.
A Turning Point
In September 2011, Kayla missed her usual visit to the 9/11 memorial service. Instead, she found herself at a friend’s house seeking a high, only to discover her friend overdosing. This shocking experience shifted her perspective dramatically. Finally desperate for change, she reached out to another friend, and together with their mother, they offered Kayla a safe haven. The conditions were strict, requiring regular drug tests and enrollment in Teen Challenge.
Opening Doors to Healing
On September 11th, a decade after losing her father, Kayla embarked on a new path at a rehabilitation center. There, a counselor shared a powerful message from Romans 8:28, which resonated deeply within her troubled soul. This verse reaffirmed that God does not cause pain but works it for good. Something clicked inside Kayla’s heart, and she found solace in the realization that she was not alone.
A Journey to Redemption
From that moment on, Kayla refused to let drugs control her life. She turned to faith, attending church and experiencing emotional healing through the prayers of others. Eventually, she gave her heart to Jesus Christ and embraced baptism. Kayla felt validated, knowing that God loved her and did not abandon her in her pain.
Finding Purpose and Healing
Today, Kayla, alongside her husband Kyle, is a mother of three girls, with another child on the way. They run Trails of Purpose, a counseling and equine therapy ranch for soldiers struggling with PTSD. While the trauma and memories of 9/11 will always be a part of her life, Kayla has discovered that redirecting her pain towards helping others is a healing force. By choosing Christ every day, she finds strength and purpose in her journey.
